Dec 14

There is a women’s group on Facebook

There is a women’s group on Facebook ….

mumIn fact there are probably thousands of women’s group on Facebook, but there is one here in Dubai that seems to get peoples feathers ruffled on a regular basis.   There is no need for me to name said group as I am 100% sure that any of you who are reading this will know exactly which group I am referring too.   A group that was set up to support Mum’s of a certain nationality based in Dubai. Enough said.

Since the invention of the internet it has become more and more common for people to document their lives via various social media channels. The days of a diary being kept a secret are long gone,  people seem to crave seeing a comment or count a like on Facebook.   Is it a bored housewives syndrome we have to ask ourselves?  maybe these people would be better of spending time running their home and being active with their families rather than being sat behind a laptop, or on their smartphones judging and commenting on other  people’s lives.

We have an on-line forum here in the UAE ran by an expat women’s group, a group who thought they had the monopoly of women’s dilemmas and on-line discussions.  This however, over time has changed and the introduction of groups on Facebook has resulted in people no longer being able to hide behind a fake name where they can sit in judgement of other women.  Now we know what people are saying, we know their opinions, to be quite frank with you we know too much about some people.   I remember many years ago someone getting upset that a comment she had made on the afore mentioned forum had ended up being published in a local newspaper.  Do people really not know or understand exactly what is the world-wide web is and how it works.

I digress, getting back to what I started this post about, the group for Mum’s of a certain nationality.   I was a member of this group for quite some time.  I am not known for being the shy or retiring type and don’t suffer fools gladly or stupidity easily. I often read posts (as many people do) and never made any comment.  The said group I found somewhat amusing at times. The stupidity of some literally left me in tears of laughter. The day a post appeared asking for the phone number for 800 JUNK still makes me smile.  The majority of the members of this group also have no idea how to use google, assume everyone lives in the same street as they do and enjoy asking unqualified strangers for medical advice.  The daily attention seeking/pity posts can become quite draining too.  Dubai is a village and usually during the day it won’t take you any longer than 30 minutes to get from one side to the other, yet people constantly request that everything is on their doorstep, often not even explaining where it is they do live.  Another classic post is which is ridiculously stupid is where to go for dinner, another bragging post which often results in copious recommendations for 5* establishments on Palm Island, the original poster no doubt ends up in their local burger joint, still it looked good to be *in with the crowd*.  It also makes me wonder if many of them are suffering with alcohol addiction, not one post but multiple panic ridden posts about which days are going to be dry whenever there is a religious holiday. Really?

I was banned from the group I speak off some time ago.  Did it bother me? not at all.   People are entitled to their own opinions, something that the administrators and some of the members of said group do not understand or respect.  I will willingly admit that I can be quite outspoken and somewhat judgemental on certain matters.  I also understand the world-wide web which is why I didn’t get upset when I heard that links from this very website were being shared into the group on a daily basis.

There are many women who have lived in the Middle East for many years, I recently met a lady who has been here 40 years,  I was at a lunch with her and some other women who have all lived here 30 years.  What is different about these ladies is none of them are social media savvy and don’t use any means of social media so they don’t have the ability to share their wisdom or knowledge about life in the UAE.  Possibly these women wouldn’t want to share their wisdom or knowledge, who knows?   However I was more than happy to share my experiences about living in the UAE, as were many of my friends who were also removed from the group for having an opinion of their own.

It feels to me as if people get on a plane, in particular from the United Kingdom and arrive here and undergo some kind of personality change.   I wonder if they would post something on their Facebook page at *home* informing a group of strangers how much rent they pay, or what kind of car they drive? These posts are the ones I affectionately call *brag posts*.  Put it this way; many appear to have left their semi-detached in Rochdale as Dave Smith (and co family builder) and arrive here as David Smythe, Director of Construction, and set up home in a terraced villa in The Springs, which they constantly refer to as Emirates Hills.  Whilst living the life and driving the latest Range Rover, I guess the majority of them are also calculating how much interest they are paying to the bank each month.

At the end of the day whatever floats your boat, I am lucky to say that I am in a few other groups on Facebook that I really do enjoy being an active member of, thankfully they appear to be full of normal everyday people who are happy to share information and support each other, which is more than can be said for the group who shall not be named.

Happy posting!!  you can follow my on-line life via my Facebook and Twitter feeds 🙂




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    • Richa on December 14, 2015 at 10:08 pm
    • Reply

    So glad to have read this from the beginning to the end.. Yes even I have felt that Dubai changes people irrespective of their nationality.. It is all about the show business here.. I know of people who live in small apartments but buy the high end models of range rovers and always put up posts about the materialistic stuff on FB.. So finally do these people live a life to show off to others who are mainly their virtual friends?? Social media and the World Wide Web surely have distanced people as much as they have shrunk the world.. 🙁

    1. Thanks for posting, you have a valid comment, we all know how many arguments have started over FB comments! 🙂

    • Kate Gravestock on December 15, 2015 at 9:51 am
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    Absolutely brilliant Debbie! I too, have felt EXACTLY the same. Well written.

    1. thanks for posting, glad this post has been so well received 🙂

    • Trish on December 15, 2015 at 2:11 pm
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    You will find these people all over the world…. In expat situations…. As you say, it doesnt take them long to arrive, and froget that they do not have a driver and maid, back home…. And their house is just an ordinary one.. As is their life back there.
    As soon as you said they had banned you from their group… I smiled and thought, you are obviously my sort of person… 🙂

    1. Opinions are not allowed, hence GA wasn’t allowed either lol

    • Dawn Mann on December 15, 2015 at 4:44 pm
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    And the constant need for everything ‘on the cheap’ and in the next breath they’re jetting off to Bali/ Maldives etc, etc. Everything has to be organic and environmentally sound except their massive carbon footprint. They irritate me with their inane ramblings!

    1. Is it in the blue book?

    • Soleil on December 15, 2015 at 7:04 pm
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    When it first started it really was an very helpful page, where you could get all the info you needed about Dubai. Over the last year or so it has become an ego trip for the admins, who allow advertisements only from those who ‘donate’ to THEIR selected charity (It’s only a few hundred Dirhams, said one Admin, as if a few hundred dirhams is nothing to everyone who lives here. How arrogant.). Anyone found to be disagreeing with the admins and their views is instantly removed. Nazi Germany was more Democratic. There is absolutely no consistency, some people have been banned for swearing, other curse like sailors and remain on the page.

    Opinions are like a$$holes, in that everyone has one. If you post on a public page, you have to put your big girl pants on, and accept that other people’s views may not necessarily match your own, but deserve to be listened to nonetheless, and ought to be respected. Disagreeing with someone does not mean you are judging, it means you disagree! Look it up, it’s harmless. The page in question has, like so many things in Dubai, become a bit of a parody and worthy of a good laugh 😀

    1. Everyone has and knows an asshole 🙂

    • Daniel on December 16, 2015 at 9:07 am
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    A very nice read miss Armani..! Very nice indeed. From a former
    Dubai-ite that loved being raked over the coals by them… It was always
    Great material for the radio shows back then. All the best you!

    1. Radio material is exactly what it is!! Happy New Year Dx

    • Desjay on December 17, 2015 at 8:13 am
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    So will written, wish I had the ability to articulate my words as well as you have in this article. Most of the Dubai pages are run the same way. Don’t dare disagree with the powers that be as you risk the wrath of the queen bee and her subjects. That’s why I just removed myself.

    1. It’s probably a global issue, just feels heightened here 🙂

    • Aamna Blakey on December 17, 2015 at 4:42 pm
    • Reply

    This is so accurate, but i cant say it’s all bad. Sometimes Google doesn’t have the info and it was a great way to meet people when I first came to Dubai. I try and stay aways from the obviously bragging posts but these people are worse in real life. Better over the net where you can choose to ignore them then in your face at a brunch or partly. Did I mention my 7 bedroom house and Aston Martin? No? That’s cause I haven’t got one lol

    1. you don’t have a 7 bedroom villa!! this is shocking news!! 😉

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